Module 5: Guidance — Meeting 2
Meeting 2
In this meeting, the disciple will share his or her Timeline. Take as much time as the disciple needs. If you need more time to go over the Disciple’s Timeline, set another time do so before moving on to the Life Theme assignment for Meeting 3.
DISCUSS the events on the timeline and begin to discern God’s work and voice in each one. How might God have used the highs and lows of your life to form them into the person he wants you to be? Allow these insights to rise to the surface naturally.
NOTE FOR THE DISCIPLER: The sharing of timelines may bring up past hurts, habits, and hangups that may still have present effects. That’s ok! Listen intently, and love them where they’re at. If the disciple is looking to process these things more deeply, Module 6 Meeting 2 will give them the chance to fill out an “addiction inventory” to figure out next steps towards freedom.
How to Listen Well to Someone’s Life Story
Sharing a Timeline is a vulnerable act. For many disciples, it may be the first time they have told their whole story to anyone. The discipler’s most important job in this meeting is not to explain or fix, but to listen. James 1:19 is a good guide: "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."
Give your full attention. Put your phone away and make eye contact.
Ask gentle, open questions. "What was that season like for you?" "Where do you think God was in that?"
Resist quick answers. Painful events rarely need an immediate explanation.
Reflect back what you notice. "It sounds like God used that move to bring new friends into your life."
Thank them for their honesty. Acknowledge the courage it took to share.
Discerning God’s Work in the Highs and Lows
As the disciple walks through their Timeline, look together for signs of God’s presence and purpose. Helpful questions include:
Where did God provide, protect or redirect you?
Which difficult seasons shaped your character or compassion?
Were there people God placed in your life at key moments?
Which events led you closer to God? Which led you away, and how did he bring you back?
Are there any turns that still feel unresolved or painful?
When Painful Memories Surface
It is common for a Timeline to bring up past hurts, habits and hang-ups that still affect the disciple today. That is okay. Love them where they are. Some issues may be ready to talk about now; others may need more time. If the disciple wants to process these things more deeply, Module 6 includes an Addiction Inventory. For trauma, abuse or serious mental health struggles, encourage the disciple to connect with a pastor or a professional counsellor alongside your meetings.
Preparing to Discern a Life Theme
After this meeting, the disciple begins looking for patterns and themes in their Timeline. A Life Theme is a short, clear statement of how God has woven the events of their life together, and something to hold on to as they live toward the future. Examples might include "God uses my brokenness to bring others hope" or "I am called to create places of belonging." Encourage the disciple to take their time, pray and bring a draft to Meeting 3.
ASSIGNMENT: If you as the Disciple are ready to move on after discussing your timeline, then begin to discern a Life Theme using the resource provided below. Come back with the completed assignment ready to discuss with your Discipler.
Continue the Pathway — You are in Module 5: Guidance, Meeting 2 of 4. Previous: Meeting 1 — Your Life Timeline. Next: Meeting 3 — Your Life Theme. Every essay, worksheet and video for this module is collected on the Module 5 resources page.
Discerning a Life Theme
By Megan Koch
As you begin to identify the most significant events of your life and plot them together on a timeline, you will begin to uncover details you’ve never noticed before.
Spend time between now and your next meeting simply studying your timeline with God. Consider the positive and negative turns, and the redemptive perspective you’ve gained.
How have these events worked together to shape you into who you are today?
Where was God speaking and acting within them, even if you didn’t realize it at the time?
What unique qualities thread these events together, even if they previously seemed unrelated?
Begin to identify patterns and themes within the timeline. The ways God repeatedly works in and through our gifts, passions, failures, suffering, and victories are bright clues into our purpose and calling.
For example, many who have suffered with addiction recognize that God is redeeming their past in order for them to help others with the same struggle. Similarly, some who have endured the loss of loved ones are uniquely gifted to help others grieve.
The goal of a Life Theme is to identify the ways God has woven your life events together to make you into who you are today, but also something to hold on to as you live toward tomorrow. It is helpful to be able to say it in a clear, short sentence that describes who you are and what you’re here for.
Some possible life theme examples:
Reclaiming joy.
Helping others find freedom.
Words that move.
Creating belonging.
Freely giving.
Ridding others of shame
Obviously, each person’s theme will be unique! Feel free to prayerfully and creatively discern what your Life Theme will be, using the guidance of your Discipler if you need help. Once you know what it is, write it down.